ADR Options

ADR processes tend to be less adversarial and more casual than the traditional court setting, and may encourage and facilitate early settlement. With mediation and collaborative family law, parents or other parties in a custody dispute (along with their attorneys) have an opportunity to play an active role in resolving key decisions related to custody and visitation, instead of having a third party (judge or jury) make those decisions. Rarely used in family law cases, arbitration is a more structured ADR option, in which a neutral third-party makes decisions after hearing each side's evidence and arguments. The arbitrator's decision in a custody case is not necessarily final, and the parties may still be able to resolve key issues before a court at a later date.  

In some states, divorcing parents are required to attempt resolution of custody disputes through mediation, so it is a good idea to understand your options. Learn more about out-of-court alternatives for resolving a child custody matter:

Mediation

Child Custody Mediation FAQ
More on Mediation in a Divorce Case

Collaborative Family Law

Collaborative Family Law: Overview 
Collaborative Family Law: Resources

Finalizing Custody Out-of-Court: Parenting Agreements

Whether the parties resolve a child custody dispute out-of-court through informal negotiation or ADR, the result is a written document which finalizes what was agreed upon. This agreement is usually shown to a judge for final approval. If the custody agreement is part of the parents' divorce, the agreement is filed in court in the county/district branch of state court where the divorce petition was filed. An informal court hearing may follow, during which the judge will ask some basic factual questions, and whether each party understands and chose to voluntarily sign the agreement. As long as the judge is satisfied that the agreement was fairly negotiated, and the terms do not appear to blatantly favor one spouse over the other, the agreement will almost always receive court approval. In most states, the custody or parenting agreement then becomes a binding court order or "decree," and the parents or other parties to the agreement must adhere to it or face legal consequences.