Mediation experience. It is also critical that your legal adviser be experienced in and supportive of mediation. A legal adviser who is ignorant of or hostile to mediation can undermine everything you are trying to accomplish in mediating your divorce. For example, a lawyer who doesn't approve of mediation or who thinks mediation is a good idea but doesn't know enough about it could easily advise you to take a position that is legally correct but extremely adversarial. What you want is advice designed to inform you of your legal rights and to help you promote a reasonable settlement.

For information on finding, interviewing, and selecting a legal adviser, as well as how to work best with the legal adviser, see Divorce Without Court: A Guide to Mediation and Collaborative Law, by attorney-mediator Kathleen E. Stoner (Nolo). (Collaborative law is another option for divorcing without a court battle; see What is Collaborative Divorce? for more information.)

Most divorce lawyers also expect to be paid an initial large retainer (advance deposit) of several thousand dollars to cover the cost of beginning a contested case. However, because you hope that mediating your case will lead to an agreement for an uncontested divorce, you shouldn't have to pay a large retainer to your legal adviser.

Look for a legal adviser who will charge you only by the hour, without a big retainer. When you find a legal adviser who charges by the hour without requiring a retainer, be sure to confirm the fee arrangement in writing.